Actually, I’m not sure if Columbugg was the horrible person that Columbus was, but probably.

Transcript:

Mrs Bugg is an adorable native girl, with grass skirt, bra made of coconut halves, and a bow with arrow already nocked and ready. Behind her is dense, jungly undergrowth studded by palm trees. In front of her, Mr Bugg has just come ashore from his galleon, anchored just offshore of a tropical island. He is wearing a pith helmet, and waving a … musket? Yes, let’s go with that … and a short sword. Not pictured: STDs, tendency to enslave native populations, thievery and rape.

The text reads: “Decembugg 5, 1492: Christopher Columbugg becomes the first Eurobugg to set foot on Hisbugnialo.”